[sleek black Maine Coon, in leather flying jacket, enters the Maine Coon Hall of Heroes and beckons all to join him. As the room fills with solemn kitties and hoomins, he walks to the mantel over the fireplace, and turns another nipbeer mug toward the wall. He backs up a couple of steps, salutes smartly, pauses in thought, looking at the mugs of ALL our departed frens, then turns to face the gathered frens. He speaks] My frens, we have gathered to bid our esteemed fren, Mr. Gato/Biker Coon a safe journey to the Rainbow Bridge and to honor his memory. [wipes tear] He was the bestest bub a kitty could ever hope to know, and the bested bub ever to his daddy, Unkle Tony. Let us pause for a moment and offer prayers for him and for his family, especially Unkle Tony, who is taking this veryveryvery hard. Mr. Wendell has joined us today, even though he misses his brother very much. [During the silence, a squadron of kittyjets flies overhead, one plane pulling up and away in the famous "missing kitty" formation.] [sssniffle] We haven't done this ceremony and gathering for the frens who have left us this year, but you will notice that the mugs of those departed frens have been turned, also. We are most honored that their hoomins and kittyfamilies have joined us. [As he continues speaking about the wonderful frens we miss so much, Hunty, Maxwell, Shadrach, Punkin, and Hobbes present memorial plaques to the hoomins who have lost a much-beloved furfren since the last ceremony. A duplicate plaque is then hung on the Wall of Heroes.] [Major turns to Unkle Tony] Please accept this plaque on behalf of all of Biker Coon's frens, which are legion. He was a veryveryvery special bub to us all, and we will never forget him. [salutes Unkle Tony and heaves a heavy sigh] If yew would all take your mugs from the sidebar, we shall offer a toast. [everycat takes his/her mug of nipbeer, and waits quietly] To Biker Coon, who loved his family and gave them joy, comnfort, and love. May his memory and principles live forever in our hearts. [all drink] To all our departed frens, and loved ones, who have each left a little of their soul intertwined with ours. [all drink] My frens, let us all retire to the banquet room, to eat, drink, and tell the stories of our lives together, and how much we mean to each other. [all move to the next room and begin to mingle, some laffing at old stories, some in tears, but all remembering the common love of each other and kitties that we share.] Major Bootsie, Gizmo, Sassy, Whiskers and Spook form a circle in the meatloaf position of respect, and purrrrrrrrr for a peaceful journey for Biker Coon and for Unka Tony and Antie Patty. They are joined by Genghis, Lucy, Allie, Marvin, Sticky, BH, Rambetta, Callette and Denis [Sebastian, who is part Maine Coon, and hiz liddel sisfur Zoe enter the banquet room with the rest of the kitties. He lifts his mug in a toast in honor of Biker Coon and the other kitties who have this year gone on before] To ower Absent Frens! [The other kitties lift their mugs in unison.] Tu ower Absent Frens! [all drink] Pixie, Kibbie, Mollie an Kiri assum duh meetlof posishun an raise their mugs in salut (Small brown tabby ushers her clowder into the Hall, gently pulls Azad away from the collection of mugs which he had never seen before) (whisper) Wuz dat wun...? Yes, Zoddy, dat wuz his. Dere is a mug heer fur all owr frends at da Bridge, all wif dere nayms turrnd tu da wall. Now, take a glass an joyn da toste. Wee ar onord to saloot owr gud frend, Gato, also nown as Biker Coon. Hee wuz a handsum boy, gentull an calm as most kitties ov da Maine Coon breeed ar, an deeely beeluffd by his dadTony an momPatty. Wee will miss him, until wee meeet agin. To all owr frends, hoo haff moofd on ahed....auf wiedersehen. Mietze wiff Norville, Neko, Azad, Buster Badseed, an Ella too Distinguished elderly brown tabby and young tortie gurl enter the ruum tugedder. Siggy lifts his glass (he drinks nipwine) and maykes uh last tohst tu Biker Coon. "Tu yew, mye owld frend. Fur duh lyfe yew led, and duh lyfe yet tu cum." Tortiegurl Samantha watches wide-eyed. "He shur must haff bin sumfin, ryte Unca Siggy?" And for his hoomins, condolences and thoughts of comfort. Biker Coon was very special and loved by all. Beverly (Bob-tailed tabby gurl solemnly drapes her drum in black and plays a muffled cadence as the kitties and friends gather.) Hail and farewell, gud friend. We will always remember yew. --Talisker Pippin Classic Brown Tabby Young Lady Maine Coon Cat enters the room with ignity, walks over to the mantle, takes her cup, which reads "DYNAmo/mite". She fills it with nip wine and holds it high. To Biker Coon, who wuz like a brudder to me, tho I hardly knew him well enough, we are all related by the love we share with our humans, and each other. Dyna downs her drink and assums meat-loaf position, purring Biker to Rainbow Bridge. Cheerz to yew, Biker Coon. Anuther old frend gone to thuh Bridj. Oh my, thuh partees that must be going on up ther! My deepest simpathee, Unca Tony. Yew know yew will see him again. Gretchen Marie, SOC, Justicat, Chemikat, TCC, PCC, BCCC Major, dat wuz beeyootiful. Da Faison furs and dare mommy, wif MMS Pixie, Kibbie, Mollie an Kiri assum duh meetloaf posishun an raise their mugs in salut Kim Olson And they are joined by Junior, Poppa, Bitsy, Baby, Cookie and Cinni Punkins & Puddi Cat join theirz friendz in the circle and add theirz voices to the purring. Go well Biker Coon, until weeze met again. Mayz youze hearts heal and have only gud memories Unkle Tony and Anti Patty.